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kedreeva:

cipheramnesia:

cipheramnesia:

bogleech:

cdn-apex-predator:

omghotmemes:

This Trilobite walked 6 inches 600 million years ago to send us all a dick pic

the long game

Imagine in another 600 million years your fossilized corpse is found by things that laugh at how much your footprints look like their copulatory flaps

I’d be a fuckin comedy legend.

Imagine making a dick joke and having it outlast the entire human race. Monumental.

image
image
image
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the ichnofossil rusophycus, made by trilobites resting in sediment. looks like. well. you know.

image

figure A here even has a clit …

+

kedreeva:

cipheramnesia:

cipheramnesia:

bogleech:

cdn-apex-predator:

omghotmemes:

This Trilobite walked 6 inches 600 million years ago to send us all a dick pic

the long game

Imagine in another 600 million years your fossilized corpse is found by things that laugh at how much your footprints look like their copulatory flaps

I’d be a fuckin comedy legend.

Imagine making a dick joke and having it outlast the entire human race. Monumental.

image
image

sparrowlucero:

a few dragon designs

(up in my kofi shop as adoptables!
)

im really over the whole “funny thing” where its like. a lesbian is like umm isnt it soo funny someone would suggest i might get pregnant if im sexually active? HAH! for you see, i am a lesbian, a title which automatically precludes anyone under it from ever possibly getting pregnant from a consensual sexual partner! no i dont take birth control, silly, what would be the point of that? psh!

like its just transphobia atp and really not quirky or as funny as they think it is. thats all

glolb:

image

i would never do this shit

boag:

image

tooies:

tooies:

tooies:

tooies:

how is the word “cellphone” pronounced

chel-po-ne (CORRECT and GOOD answer)

kaey-poen (WRONG and BAD answer)

something else (????????)

see results

was originally gonna go with “dog” but decided to go for a longer word with more “reasonable” mispronunciations instead, but that ended up backfiring and now like half the people on this post think i actually pronounce it like this. guess you could say it was a bit of a. a b. it was a

it was a bit of a self-own

READING COMPREHENSION QUESTIONS

  1. why might op have said that she wanted to choose a word with “more ‘reasonable’ mispronounciations”? what could the quotes around “reasonable” indicate? why did she say mispronunciations instead of pronounciations?
  2. op writes that the post “backfired” and now “half the people on this post think i actually pronounce it like this.” what might the word “backfired” mean in this context?
  3. what words could “self-own” sound similar to, and how could that relate to the rest of the post?
an orange tabby cat lying down on a pile of blankets at the foot of a bed. his eyes are half-closed in a sleepy expression and his cheeks are squished into a round shape.ALT
a narrow mirror reflecting the image of an orange tabby cat sleeping on a bed, the top of his head pressed against the wall and his front feet between the mattress and the wall.ALT
an orange tabby cat lying on his back beneath a chair, his head perked up to look at something out of frame and his front paws tucked in near his chest.ALT
an orange tabby cat lying at the foot of a bed with back turned to the camera. he is leaning his head against the wall and looking back at the camera over his shoulder.ALT
an orange tabby cat lying in a half "loaf" at the foot of a recently made bed, his eyes squinted half shut and one paw stuck out in front of him.ALT
a close up of an orange tabby cat grabbing onto a person's wrist as they are petting his cheek. his eyes are shut and ears are held back.ALT
an orange tabby cat pictured from above, loafing on a leather couch. he is looking up at the camera with big soulful eyes.ALT
an orange tabby cat halfway sitting on a chair next to a couch, with one front paw and the opposite back paw supporting his weight on the edge of the couch cushion. he is looking at something out of frame with an alert and slightly unsure expression.ALT
an orange tabby cat snuggled up on the leg of the picture taker. his eyes are closed and his front paws are holding onto their hand as they scratch his chest.ALT
a close-up of a sleeping orange tabby cat. one of his cheeks is squished against a blanket and his other eye is slightly open so that his third eyelid is visible.ALT

this cat is literally unbelievable. most of my camera roll consists of pictures of this thing

last night i ordered mcdonalds on doordash while drunk but i didnt receive my blueberry muffin that i ordered to reach the minimum for free delivery but i s2g i smelled it in the bag and im so afraid that one of the cats stole it while i was unawares and that now theres just a blueberry muffin on its way to becoming a mold lump hidden somewhere in the apartment. but its also extremely likely they just didnt give me my blueberry muffin bc they do that shit a lot

foxofninetales:

Thinking today about how as someone with major texture issues around most fruits and vegetables, it would have helped so much if someone had come to me years ago and said

Hey:

  1. Make it tiny
  2. Mix it with something Good Texture that you like

“Eat healthy!” they say, and then they show you pictures of a smiling woman digging a fork into half a butternut squash or eyeing a bowl of whole blueberries like a ravening wolf and your spine wants to crawl out through your skull at the thought of that Texture in your mouth.

But you know what I can do? Cut zucchini into paper-thin slices and cook it with noodles and marinara. Chop that spinach fine and scramble it with eggs and cheese. If I’m having a day where the thought of a grape popping in my mouth makes me nauseous, I can cut it in half. My chinese takeout gets diced into tiny pieces and mixed into the rice. It doesn’t work with everything - seeds are still a Major Problem - but the number of fruits and veg and even world cuisines that I can eat has expanded SO MUCH since I discovered this. YMMV, but it’s such a stupidly simple thing to do, and nobody ever told me.

xuethms